Lance Armstrong surfaces in 'How-to-fix-flat' tutorial (VIDEO)

If you were wondering what embattled cyclist Lance Armstrong has been up to, the answer seems to be making how-to videos on changing bike tires.

Armstrong — who has largely been out of the spotlight since confessing to using performance-enhancing drugs in a interview with Oprah Winfrey more than a year ago — appears in this homespun handyman tutorial on OutsideOnline.com. 

Accompanied by the gentle strumming of a folksy banjo, the website's video introduces the disgraced cyclist with: "Cycling’s most famous pariah has been looking for work lately. We caught up with him at his latest bike-shop gig to hear a few pointers about what to do when you break down."

The 42-year-old Armstrong — sporting an apron and biking cap — starts out the video with a genial introduction, "Hi. I'm Lance Armstrong, seven-time winner of the Tour de France," But when that title appears on the screen, a big asterisk flashes up, noting that Armstrong was stripped of the seven titles for doping. Armstrong just shrugs and continues, "Hey, I didn't write the script."

And with that, we get to see a once-respected-champion-turned-outcast hold class on the simple task of changing a tire and a sad attempt at humor to get the public to forgive him.

You could also call it a how-to-fix-an-image video as well.

Cyclist Mark Cavendish sprayed with urine at Tour de France

British cyclist Mark Cavendish claims he was doused with urine by a lunatic spectator during the eleventh stage of the Tour de France Tuesday, reports The Telegraph.

Cavendish, who first thought it was water, made the stomach-turning discovery by tasting the liquid.

The 28-year-old declined to comment on the incident but that didn't stop his team manager, Patrick Lefevere, from expressing his disappointment.

"Probably some spectators were not very pleased with what happened yesterday and they yelled to him and then one other idiot threw urine at him," Lefevere said in reference to Cavendish’s crash with Tom Veelers near the end of Tuesday’s 10th stage. "I regret this. I always felt that cycling fans were gentlemen, enthusiastic people."

"Yes, that's true I think. I was behind him. I didn't see it, but I think it's true," Omega Pharma-Quick Step team press officer Alessandro Tegner said.

Tegner said the liquid smelled like urine and it was "all over him," and said Cavendish talked about the incident after completing the time trial.

"He said: 'I really don't know what's going on,'" Tegner said.

Tegner said the team does not know exactly where it happened on the 33-kilometer (20-mile) time-trial course to Mont-Saint-Michel on the Brittany coast.

Disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong didn’t see what all the fuss was about in expressing his opinion on Twitter. "why all the sudden shock and outrage. this has been happening for 100 years in some form or another," he tweeted.

@dwuori why all the sudden shock and outrage. this has been happening for 100 years in some form or another. piss, spit, fists, etc.
— Lance Armstrong (@lancearmstrong) July 10, 2013

"It ruins the whole atmosphere for the spectators coming to the sport. One individual doing that just leaves a bit of a bad taste in the mouth,” Tour leader Chris Froome said. “And a bad taste in Mark's mouth.”

That's one way to get a yellow jersey.

Lance Armstrong: 'Impossible' to win Tour de France without doping

Lance Armstrong  came back on Friday to haunt the 100th edition of cycling’s showcase race the Tour de France, by telling the French newspaper Le Monde he would never have won without doping.

Armstrong’s interview with the publication was surprising on many levels, not least because of his long-antagonistic relationship with the respected French daily that first reported in 1999 that corticosteroids were found in the American’s urine as he was riding his way to the first of his seven Tour wins. In response, Armstrong complained he was being persecuted by “vulture journalism, desperate journalism.”

In Friday's interview — published in French — Armstrong claimed that it was “impossible” to win the Tour without doping when he was racing. Armstrong already told television talk show host Oprah Winfrey when he finally confessed this January that doping was just “part of the job” of being a pro cyclist.

Not one  to shy away from the limelight or minimize his cheating, Armstrong told Le Monde he still considers himself the record-holder for Tour victories, even though all seven of his titles were stripped from him last year for doping. He also said his life has been ruined by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency investigation that exposed as lies his years of denials that he and his teammates doped, according to The Associated Press.

The interview was the latest blast from cycling’s doping-tainted recent history to tarnish the 100-year-old race.

Previously, Armstrong’s former rival on French roads, 1997 Tour winner Jan Ullrich, confessed to blood-doping for the first time with a Spanish doctor. French media also reported that a Senate investigation into the effectiveness of anti-doping controls pieced together evidence of drug use at the 1998 Tour by Laurent Jalabert, a former star of the race now turned broadcaster.

The banned hormone erythropoietin, or EPO, wasn’t detectable by cycling’s doping controls until 2001 and so was widely abused because it prompts the body to produce oxygen-carrying red blood cells, giving a big performance boost to endurance athletes.

Armstrong was clearly talking about his own era, rather than the Tour today. Le Monde reported that he was responding to the question: “When you raced, was it possible to perform without doping?”

“That depends on which races you wanted to win. The Tour de France? No. Impossible to win without doping. Because the Tour is a test of endurance where oxygen is decisive,” Le Monde quoted Armstrong as saying.

Some subsequent media reports about Le Monde’s interview concluded that Armstrong was saying doping is still necessary now, rather than when he was winning the Tour from 1999-2005. That suggestion provoked dismay from current riders, race organizers and the sport’s governing body, the International Cycling Union or UCI.

“If he’s saying things like he doesn’t think that it’s possible to win the Tour clean, then he should be quiet — because it is possible,” said American rider Tejay van Garderen of the BMC team.

Asked later by The Associated Press to clarify his comments, Armstrong said on Twitter that he was talking about the period from 1999-2005. He indicated that doping might not be necessary now.

On Friday, a number of Tour de France riders hit back at Armstrong dismissing the claims by the shamed American cyclist, saying his remarks hurt their credibility.

Lance Armstrong plays drums in front of 10,000 people at Texas reggae festival

Lance Armstrong, the disgraced cyclist who was knocked from the winner's podium for steroid use, has found a new stage to keep him in the public eye.  The seven-time Tour de France champion, who tooted his own horn denying his PED use for years, was spotted playing the drums in front of 10,000 hometown music fans at the 2013 Austin Reggae Festival.

The founder of the Livestrong Foundation jammed with a band called Herbstrong on the Austin, Texas stage and — from the sound of his Twitter account — it sounds like a future in music is more unnerving than facing the USADA to the troubled athlete.

"Drumming in front of 10,000 peeps had me more than a little freaked," he tweeted after getting behind the skins on four songs.

Hey, it's got to be better than getting caught playing the bongos naked like his good bud Matthew McConaughey.



Since last fall, Armstrong's  name has mainly been tied to negative media headlines. He's facing several multi-million dollar lawsuits, many speculated Armstrong’s April sale of his 7,850-square-foot spread in Austin was at least partially a bid to defer mounting legal costs.

Also this month, Armstrong, who is banned for life from competing in any Olympic sport, was preparing to race in a swimming competition that did not test its entrants for performance enhancing drugs.

Upon learning of Armstrong’s intention, the International Swimming Federation banned him from the event and from all future events that they sponsor.

Is music a part of Armstrong’s future?  Who knows. At least there's no drugs involved in the world of reggae or rock n' roll. 

Helluva good time sitting in with @lanceherbstrong 2night @austinreggae. Drumming in front of 10,000 peeps had me more than a little freaked
— Lance Armstrong (@lancearmstrong) April 21, 2013

Cyclist causes uproar after squeezing model's bottom at winner's podium

Fabian Cancellara was the winner of Sunday's Tour of Flanders cycling race — but it was the second place finisher who grabbed all the attention.

While second place-Cannondale team rider Peter Sagan stood next to Radio Shack rider Cancellara and a couple of female models at the winner's podium, Sagan gave a big smile for the cameras before reaching over and pinching one of the young ladies' behinds, said Mailonline.com.

Sagan's cheeky grab was caught by dozens of cameras, outraged some riders and clearly surprised the blond model.  The Slovakian cyclist later apologized on Twitter for his unprofessional conduct.

Was not my intention todisrespect women today on the podium. Just a joke, sorry if someone was disturbed about it.
— Peter Sagan (@petosagan) March 31, 2013

Some groups are now calling for cycling to eliminate kisses at the winner's podium and call using the "trophy" women sexist.

Others still seem to think Lance Armstrong is the real "bummer" in the sport.

Nike suspends contract with Oscar Pistorius

In a not so surprising move, Nike suspended its contract with accused murderer Oscar Pistorius Wednesday.

The athletic apparel company released a statement on its website announcing a split with the South African double-amputee known as the "Blade Runner," after he was charged with premeditated murder of his girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp.

"We believe Oscar Pistorius should be afforded due process and we will continue to monitor the situation closely," Nike said in the statement.

Pistorius had previously appeared in a series of Nike ads showing him running in his carbon-fiber prosthetic legs.

One ad showed the obstacles the young Pistorius overcame during his childhood leading up to his much publicized appearance in the 2012 London Olympics.

The eyeglass manufacturer Oakley also suspended a deal with the sprinter.



This isn't the first time Nike has had to deal with disgraced athletes representing their products. Nike terminated their contract with cyclist Lance Armstrong after he admitted to using PEDs earlier this year and was criticized for using golfer Tiger Woods after his marriage infidelities emerged.

Report: Lance Armstrong will admit to doping during Oprah interview

When Lance Armstrong sits down with Oprah Winfrey on her couch to tape an interview Monday, the television host is expected to get a bombshell admission from the cyclist at his Austin, Texas home.

Armstrong, who was banned for life and stripped of his seven Tour de France titles, plans to admit to doping throughout his career, according to a report in USA Today, after steadfastly denying the allegations for years and lashing out at his accusers.

It will be his first interview since he was stripped of his titles after an in-depth report from the  U.S. Anti-Doping Agency accused him of doping while leading the U.S. Postal Service cycling team.

However, it is unlikely Armstrong will go into details of the alleged use of performance-enhancing drugs  and blood doping during the 90-minute interview, a source told USA Today.

The show will be televised Thursday, Jan. 17 on the Oprah Winfrey Network's "Oprah's Next Chapter" and streamed live on Oprah.com at 9 p.m. ET.

The network released this statement:

"Armstrong will address the alleged doping scandal, years of accusations of cheating, and charges of lying about the use of performance-enhancing drugs throughout his storied cycling career"

The purpose of the admission would be to talk anti-doping officials into restoring his eligibility in his athletic pursuits — including triathlon and cycling events — in which the shamed Armstrong has been banned.

The 41-year-old Armstrong lost most of his sponsors and resigned from the board of his cancer-fighting Livestrong Foundation after the 1,000 page report was released last October.

Earlier this week, Armstrong's attorney, Tim Herman, denied Armstrong would admit to the doping allegations.

Who gets Lance Armstrong's titles now— other suspected dopers?

The U.S. Anti-Doping Agency said on Thursday it will strip Lance Armstrong of his seven Tour de France titles.  While the cyclists Armstrong beat have another chance to get his relinquished titles, it isn't going to be easy for organizers to sift through the the second and third--place finishers to find a deserving winner.

All eight men who finished in second and third place, respectively, during Armstrong's championship reign have some sort of ties to doping in what is now being called the world's dirtiest sport.

The USADA, in its zeal to clean up the sport, may be opening up a Pandora's medicine chest of unprecedented doping in the sport and bring on even more headaches.  It'll be pretty funny when a sixteenth-place finisher is the first "clean" rider who can get a title.

Here's a look at who else was on the podium in the seven Tours that Armstrong won from 1999-2005:

1999

No. 2 : Alex Zulle, Switzerland. His 1998 team, Festina, was ousted from the Tour that year in connection with the widespread use of the performance-enhancing drug EPO. Zulle later admitted to using the blood-booster over the four previous years. The Festina affair nearly derailed the 1998 Tour, and is widely seen as the first big doping scandal to jolt cycling.

No. 3: Fernando Escartin, Spain.

2000

No 2: Jan Ullrich, Germany. The 1997 Tour winner, a five-time Tour runner-up and longtime Armstrong rival. He was the top-name cyclist among at least 50 implicated in the "Operation Puerto" police investigation in Spain in May 2006. Ullrich was stripped of his third-place finish from the 2005 Tour and retired from racing two years later. Earlier this year, he confirmed that he had had contact with Eufemiano Fuentes, a Spanish doctor at the center of that scandal, calling it a "big mistake" - but did not admit to doping.

No. 3: Joseba Beloki, Spain. Implicated in Operation Puerto, he retired in 2007. He was reportedly was cleared by a Spanish court of any involvement in the case.

2001

No 2: Ullrich.

No. 3: Beloki.

2002

No. 2: Beloki.

No. 3: Raimondas Rumsas, Lithuania. On the last day of the 2002 Tour, police stopped his wife, Edita, at the Italian border and searched her car, turning up suspected doping products. A French court later handed them four-month prison sentences on doping-related charges. The cyclist denied taking banned substances at that event, and all his tests came back negative. He said the products in his wife's car were for his mother-in-law. The next year, he was given a one-year ban after testing positive for EPO in the 2003 Giro d'Italia.

2003

No. 2: Ullrich.

No. 3: Alexandre Vinokourov, Kazakhstan. He later served a two-year doping suspension after twice testing positive for banned blood transfusions during the 2007 race. He won the Olympic road race in London last month and has announced plans to retire.

2004

No. 2: Andreas Kloeden, Germany.  A German national doping agency is reportedly opening up an investigation into the cyclist's past history.

No. 3: Ivan Basso, Italy. Excluded from the 2006 Tour because of his involvement in Operation Puerto. He claimed that he gave his blood to Fuentes - the Spanish doctor at the center of that scandal - but never used it. Later that year, Basso received a two-year doping ban; he later returned, and won his second Giro d'Italia in 2010.

2005

No. 2: Basso.

No. 3: Ullrich.  

Have fun with that. 

Judgment Day 2011; Athletes Who Will Be Left Behind

The End is Near.  No, it's not a proclamation by either the NFL regarding the lockout or the GM of the Phoenix Coyotes on the hockey team's future.   It's the Day of Reckoning for Mankind, so say the lunatic members of a doomsday group who predict the world will cease to exist after the earth is rattled by series of earthquakes and tidal waves tomorrow between 5 and 6 p.m. 

New York City has been plastered with ads warning if the upcoming Apocalypse on Saturday July 21 and how God will only spare those who are pure of heart.

So people, you don't have to fret over overdue library books or the vig to your loan shark.  Go ahead, make that nasty, drunken text to your ex because, after tomorrow, it won't matter.   It'll all be over soon.

This presumed "Rapture" will spare the souls of the pure by whisking them into heaven while the rest of mankind will be left to face their doom on the crumbling earth.  Professional athletes--however adored on earth--are not an exception and some won't be making that trip up to eternal happiness.

I believe the world must be coming to an end because how can you explain Jason Giambi jacking three home-runs the other night.  Who even knew he was still around?

And what about the Cleveland Indians?  Best team in the majors?  Come on. We're talking about Cleveland here.  That's enough evidence for me.

Tomorrow's Doomsday is just more bad luck for Cleveland all around.  The Cavaliers finally get two top-four draft picks to make up for the left-at-the alter move by LeBron James and BOOM!   No more Rock and Roll Hall of Fame or Dawg Pound.  It's over.  If it makes Cavs fans feel any better, James will be one of the fateful ones slated to be left behind--with no championships.

The Apocalypse will bring some good things.  We won't have to wring our hands about the NFL owners and the NFLPA hugging it out.  They're all on God's naughty list anyway.