Friday, March 4, 2011

Iran Should Boycott 2012 Olympics Over Mascots Not Logo

The government of the Islamic Republic of Iran has sent a formal letter to the IOC threatening to boycott the 2012 Summer Games in London because the numbers 2012 in the logo actually spell out the word "Zion."  The thing everyone wants to know, besides what took them so long, is why they rip on the logo and not those one-eyed Olympic mascots, Wenlock and Mandeville?

The secretary-general of the Iranian Olympic Committee cited the logo and condemned it as racist and called for all Muslims to join Iran and renounce the abstract 2012 logo and boycott the Games.  Way to get your people to purge the uprisings in Egypt and Libya from their heads, sec-gen.

Since the diabolical logo's debut four years ago, the stacked, zig-zagging numbers were roundly-booed and called "bloody crap" because of the design.  There really never seemed any good reason to disparage the ubiquitous symbols except for the aesthetics.  Leave it to Iran to find a political angle in a simple poster.

Iran's letter read: "There is no doubt that negligence of the issue from your side may affect the presence of some countries in the games, especially Iran, which abides by commitment to the values and principles."

It seems those 'principles" don't relay the fact that Iran, for thirty years, refused to compete against any athletes from Israel.

It takes a lot of staring and twisting of the 2012 logo to see the word "zion' but, if you zone out long enough to make Iran's case, it's somewhat comprehensible.  It's sort of like a Rorschach blot.  Most people claim to see the word "zoiz" or a nude couple in a passionate, coital embrace.  If you hold it upside down it reads "Paul is Dead."

The IOC shrugged off Iran's threat in a press release: "Our response is as follows:  The London 2012 logo represents the figure 2012, nothing else."  In other words, "Who cares?"

Sure, it's easy to join in on the long-line of mascot bashing.  It's a four-year tradition dating back to "Izzy" in Atlanta but, if a country ever needs a reason to boycott the games, it should be because of those 2012 asexual mascots, Wennie and Mandie.  These frightful creatures look like they designed on a pub napkin after someone downed a firkin.

Are the mascots remote controls?  Robots?  Pleasure devices?  What do they have to do with athletics?  If any state-controlled dictatorship can find a subtle demonic image in these mascots, it's Iran.

Then they can just take their two lousy medals and stay home.

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