Sunday, December 2, 2012

NY Post tries to find replacement for Fireman Ed as Jets' new mascot

Not even one game has been played since Fireman Ed hung up his hat as the New York Jets unofficial mascot and The New York Post is presuming that fans are longing to find someone else to lead the home crowd with his famous "J-E-T-S!" cheer.

In this Sunday's edition, the newspaper has nominated four other potential Jetsies to fire up the crowd at  games in MetLife Stadium.

Fireman Ed, who stomped out of the stadium before halftime of the Jets pitiful 49-19 loss to the New England Patriots on Thanksgiving Day, announced last Sunday that he will no longer attend games as the beloved  — and apparently contentious — character he's been for years — or what seemed like decades.

Jets fans would probably prefer the 4-7 Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez put on some makeup and a hat to lead the cheers from the stands but The Post has narrowed it down to these uberfans as the top contenders and described them as thus:

"A motley crew of superfans who wear their devotion to Gang Green painted on their sleeves, bellies and faces."

For those of you who thought that Tim Tebow already landed the job in the second half of the Thanksgiving Day massacre — shame.



Cast your vote for one of these men before the few remaining fans forget how to spell.

Jetman:
Described as one of the team's biggest fans who lives in the heart of enemy territory — New Hampshire.  Famous for his plastic hat shaped like a jet and catchphrase, "Jetman bleeds green ... and that color never runs."  Sort of like the Jets offense.



Jetbo:
New Jersey guy known for his camouflage, green face paint and occasional rubber Incredible Hulk hands.  Catchphrase: "The few, the proud, the green!" The U.S. Marines might have a lawsuit.



Captain Jet:
Staten Island native famous for his cape and selection of 16 different custom-made helmets — one which was given to team owner Woody Johnson. His well thought out catchphrase, "Green machine!" Goes great with Burt Reynolds at QB.



James Gandolfini:
Best known for making the whole world believe that half of Jersey is Italian with mob connections — we all know they hang out at the Jersey Shore — and doing a Rutgers football commercial.  The actor would probably rather be swimming with Big Pussy than be lumped in with these mooks.  His  catchphrase will make fans head for the snack bar: "G-A-B-A-G-O-O-L!"



Check 'em out at MetLife Stadium for yourself.  Tickets are going for as little as $18 in the secondary market.

9 comments:

  1. Uh, who cares?! The press seems to think that the whole country cares and lives for any news about the Jets, guess what, we don't!

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  2. I agree with dbienko!
    Who in their right mind cares about the inept and forever sucky Jet's!
    Laughing my ass off.

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  3. HO ! Get the Badda- Bing girls to replace the cheerleaders and the team WILL go to the SUPERBOWL !!!! Hiring James Gandolfini would be AWESOME !!! and If you dont cheer for the team you get WACKED !!!!! LMFAO !!!!! Cant wait to go to the game.

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  4. Ed had a crowd that listened or went along with Ed as far as the CHANT (J-E-T-S, jets,jets,jets) went. Will they follow someone else? Will they want to cheer for a bad team? At this point maybe most of Ed's crowd will be doing what Ed is doing, "STAYING HOME" Time & Time & Time will tell if a New Ed or the real Ed will return. Go! WHO? GO! WHAT? Check the empty seats? We may not have enough for the CHANT.

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  5. What a Fairweather fan!

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  6. You do know what a mook is right??? Great Editing...

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  7. WE DO NOT NEED A MASCOT - WE NEED A FOOTBALL TEAM THAT KNOWS HOW TO WIN. AND KNOWING HOW TO WIN STARTS AT THE VERY TOP - WITH THE OWNER. WOODY YOU WANT TO MAKE $$$ - HIRE FOOTBALL PEOPLE AND LET THEM RUN THE FOOTBALL SIDE. YOUR PUBLICITY STUNTS OF FARVE, TEBOW AND SIGNING SANCHES FOR $ 8 MILLION HAVE ALL BACKFIRED ON YOU.

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  8. Every JET fan I know feels that Ed's quitting was the only highlight of this season! He's a blowhard and it wont be long before he tries to come crawling back.

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  9. He is moving to Florida and will show up at Jets Dolphins games as at transplant. This way he does not have to pay New York Taxes or heating oil bills

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